Dying Daily #48: Buried in the Sno

I remember how deep the snow would get when I was a kid, it always seemed odd that things as small as snowflakes could get so deep and so heavy.

We had a steep metal roof on our house and if you slammed the door hard enough sheets of snow would come sliding off, and they could really hurt someone if you weren’t careful. We always tried to get my mom with them.

I have something similar in my life these days, as I let things accumulate way too long when it comes to my health, be it mental or physical or emotional.

I push things further and further along, always thinking I can deal with the later and not wanting to take the time to work them out.

It’s an odd choice, because it never turns out well.

Things build up and build up and I ignore them and ignore them, but then they come due and the weight of all the things I didn’t deal with breaks my back.

I slowly start dropping the ball on choices, making poor ones, intentionally avoiding good ones. A few responsibilities start falling to the wayside, and then a few more, which only serves to make skillful choices less likely. It’s a process, an accumulation, and it is all so much easier when I take care of myself every day, dealing with things as they arise. When I don’t, I have to spend days and days shoveling it off and it is much more labor intensive.

It ends up becoming a much larger project than it should have been.

I try to work on this, and I do better than I used to, but there are a few problem areas in my life I don’t tend to deal with very well. I have a very hard time letting other people down or not being available to help, so I over-function and wind up falling off completely. I don’t prioritize ideas or projects and try to do too many, and end up doing none well.

I’m working on this, but it feels like I am always saying that.

What are your routines or habits that help you deal with things?

What has the ability to knock you off of a healthy balance?