Dying Daily #270: Accountability Revisited

“Can you elaborate on the ways to follow through?”

I try to keep things under 300 words and cannot always go into as much detail as people would like, so we’ll work on clarifying/specifying a couple of things over the next few days.

How can we establish accountability in an effective way?

This is a tough one, because the things that make accountability difficult for us are the exact same things that make accountability worthwhile: people we trust, calling us on our shit. The nature of this relationship makes respect and competence very important. Without both of these elements you are setting yourself up for trouble.

We have to respect the people we turn to for accountability or else we will not listen to what they tell us, and we will bristle at the very idea that they are telling us anything at all. This is a recipe for a failed relationship.

We need competent people in our lives because we have to be able to trust what they are telling us. It is rare to find someone who can check off all the boxes in this regard, so I try to have multiple people who are strong in different areas. I tend to look for people who are older than me, and who know about something in ways beyond book-learning. I also need to trust and respect them as a human being – someone may be very knowledgable about something, but if they are unethical or shady, they will bring trouble into your life.

I do not think a person can have wisdom without integrity, and I look for wisdom when seeking accountability.

Who do you have in your life that can fulfill the role of competent accountability?

What could you do to cultivate or foster relationships with more people who could help you grow and evolve as a person?

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